By Judi Clarke

She comes into our Show Low clinic with her Spanish speaking mom. Always dressed in cute colorful outfits with hair done up special, Emmi* is the shiest little girl I’ve ever known. Except perhaps for myself, once upon a time. I’m told when I was very little I used to hide behind my mom’s legs when asked to greet someone new. Maybe that’s why I’ve been so drawn to this little darling, hoping she would someday be comfortable with me. Working at the front desk, I don’t get to see the clients and their children for very long. I don’t sit in the classroom with them, going over the valuable lessons of the DVD they just watched and interacting with their children as they play with the toys in our rooms. The connection I build with them comes in snatches: as I greet them, lead them to their living-room-like “classroom”, see them when they make Baby Boutique purchases, and when we say good-bye.

Recently we learned little Emmi has an ailment that’s caused much discomfort for her almost two and a half years. Now being treated, she’s eating and feeling much better. I couldn’t help but hope she might begin to warm up to me more now that physical discomfort is taken out of the equation. I’ve seen progress over the months: a crack of an almost-smile, a second longer of eye contact, noticing her watching me as I relate to her mom. I’ve rejoiced at each indication of her easing shyness.

Today she came in, all dressed in purple. In her little purple pants and a purple and white sweater, she click-clacked her way down the hall in her little black shoes. Like most of our clients’ children, she knew where she was headed: to our family room with the Noah’s Ark mural painted on the wall and lots of toys on the floor. After today’s Spanish parenting DVD was complete and the client advocate went over things the best she could with limited shared language, Emmi and her mom came out to buy diapers with Mommy Money. Mom practiced her growing English, and I practiced my recognition of a few Spanish words. Emmi sat quietly in her mother’s arms while we chatted.

It was time to say our warm and smiling good-byes. I looked at Emmi and said “Bye-bye!” And then… she waved to me! So excited that she waved bye-bye to me, I said it again to her. Emmi waved again!

I am all grins this afternoon.

Judi Clarke

I love the comedy of Bill Cosby. In one of his routines he says, “I used to think that my father was an idiot, because he could never complete a sentence.” Cosby continues to explain that a father shouldn’t curse at his children, so as a father you censor yourself and say, “What the…Get your…well I’ll bust your…” and you sound like you can’t complete a full sentence! As funny and true as this illustration is, there is a bigger question at hand: What is fatherhood really about?

There is no higher calling on earth than to be a husband and father. There are three main extremes regarding fatherhood. The first is what I like to call the “best friend father.” There are fathers who want to be their children’s best friend. Discipline takes a back seat, and the father gives the children everything they want because he wants to be their best friend. This leads to disobedient and misbehaved children. The second extreme is what I call, “the tough-guy father”. These are the men who believe that true masculinity is how many scars they have. These men may be able to go and destroy half of the terrorists on the planet, but they make terrible fathers. These men take pride in their tendency to severely discipline their children. They have heavy hands and try to teach their children to be “tough.” The third and final extreme is what I call, “the La-Z-Boy father.” These fathers come home from work, plop their brains on the armchair and bark out orders. These fathers tend to be “out of the loop” regarding their children’s development, and believe that children exist to serve their father and leave him alone. None of these extremes are good portrayals of what a father should actually be.

The Bible gives us the best example for a father in God himself. He is patient, kind, loving, merciful, and full of grace. So for what reason does a father exist? Scripture teaches us that fathers exist to be an example of Christ in the home. This is a very high standard. Fathers are to be patient with their children. This is definitely easier said than done. We are to be kind, loving, merciful, and full of grace with our children. Again, this is easier said than done. Nevertheless, studies have shown that a child’s relationship with his/her father has a profound impact on who they become later in life. God promises that he helps us, through the Holy Spirit, accomplish these Christ-like qualities. Living Hope Women’s Centers is being used mightily by God to help fathers become better fathers. They have vast resources including, pamphlets, parenting classes, and a weekly Men’s Fraternity fellowship. Every father should take advantage of all their free resources.

I encourage all fathers to get on their knees every day and ask God for his guidance and qualities. Fathers cannot succeed without God’s help. Today’s culture tends to downplay the importance of a father in a child’s life. Make no mistake; a father is just as important as a mother in a child’s life. Fathers must be present in the lives of their children. The phrase, “wait until your father gets home” should bring joy to a child’s heart and not fear. It is my prayer that all fathers strive to set a Christ-like example for their children, because it’s one of the most important jobs you will ever have.

Ryan C. Smith

Associate Pastor

First Assembly of God Springerville

Monday - February 27, 2012

“I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3:16-19

We often borrow this prayer from Paul when we are talking to God about our precious residents. They rarely arrive at Hope House with Christ dwelling in their hearts by faith. They never have a grasp on how wide and long and high and deep His love is for them. What they are usually grasping desperately at is a last-ditch effort for room and board. Most of the time, they agree to our rules of church attendance, Bible study and counseling because they feel they have no other place to go. Truly, these young women don’t understand why we make them do such “meaningless” activities.

Staysha was no exception to this rule. She came to Hope House broken, pregnant and angry. She would ask her Biblical counselor “do you even have a degree?” Her hard attitude was a protective shell she had erected around herself. Staysha told many people “no one will ever love me”. She thought that there was no man out there who would want someone else’s kid.

A pregnancy resource center counselor in Havasu City, Colleen introduced Staysha to Jesus and brought her to Hope House. While living at Hope House, Staysha started to understand how much God loves her.

Over time, Staysha learned that the people at Living Hope Women’s Centers also love her. The people at Calvary Baptist Church love her. Tina became a surrogate mother to a girl who needed the love of a mother. She graduated from Hope House and went to live with Tina for a while.

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. Ephesians 3:20-21

Monday - February 6, 2012

Say to him, ‘Be careful, keep calm and don’t be afraid. Do not lose heart because of these two smoldering stubs of firewood. – Isaiah 7:4

I know. This is last week’s verse. I have learned something new about this verse and wanted to share it with you.

It is much easier to “keep calm” and “don’t be afraid” when you have first listened to God and “been careful”. I have only been back from Africa for a little over a week. Saturday morning my stomach starting hurting. I began throwing up. It got worse and worse all day long and I ended up in the emergency room on Sunday morning. I asked the doctor “could I have malaria”? I was not as calm and unafraid as I could have been because I wasn’t as careful as I should have been. Yes, I went to Africa without malaria pills. I took all the recommended shots. I wore bug spray as perfume. I slept under a mosquito net. However, I did not take the malaria pills. You may be asking - why not? My reasons really do not matter. The simple fact is I wouldn’t have been worried that I had malaria if I had just taken the pills. I could have stayed calm and waited for Monday to go to the doctor. I could have saved the emergency room charges. I could have not been afraid.

How often are we like this in our spiritual lives? We do not follow God’s counsel for a variety of reasons. We do not take time to find out what His word says regarding our situation. Or, we do not like His commands and reason that our logic is sound. Or, we feel that we deserve to “let loose” once in a while. Our capacity to reason our way out of doing what God tells us to do is truly boundless. I often get aggravated at those silly Israelites who kept falling back into grumbling, complaining and idolatry on their way out of Egypt. Then I realize that I am not all that different.

My prayer for all of us today comes from Deuteronomy 12:28 “Be careful to obey all these regulations I am giving you, so that it may always go well with you and your children after you, because you will be doing what is good and right in the eyes of the LORD your God.”